Jessy

Nothing is easy.

nobody@vox.com(So Jessy) — Fri, 16 Mar 2007 22:53:33 -0700

I swear, everything that I do is wrong the first time around! lol
Today I had to give my presentation in my Public Speaking class. I was really, really prepared. I emailed my professor the powerpoint the night before, printed out the slides for it just in case, and was actually excited instead of nervous to present it. When I got to class, the professor called me over and told me that I had saved the powerpoint as the newest version, and he can't open it up on his computer because he has the old version. He was nice enough to allow me to go to the computer lab and re-save it as the old version of powerpoint. So I do that. But, of course, the computer lab also has the old version, and it wouldn't allow me to download the patch thingy so I could open my presentation. The lady in the computer lab told me to go ask the computer coordinator thing if he had any bright ideas. I got lost finding his office, and when I did, he wasn't very interested in helping me. At this point I am freaking out. How could I possibly give a presentation with the slides that I had printed out? I was so frazzeled at this point that if I had to hold the slides up to show the class, my hands would have been shaking uncontrollably. Defeated, I began to walk back towards the Bizzini Hall to give my paper slide speech. But then it occured to me: If mom is working near the house today, maybe she can quickly stop by and re-save it on my computer as the old version, and then email it back to my professor. So I called her, and she was near home, but about five minutes away. She said she'd call back when she got there. After going through hell trying to explain to her how to do it, it was finally taken care of.

When I got back to the classroom, someone was in the middle of giving their presentation, so I waited outside until they were done so as not to disrupt it. I walk in the classroom and the professor immediately checks his email. It was there. Victory! But then he went to go turn on the projector, it didn't work. A seriously bad joke.

After minutes of messing with it, he finally got it to work (thank god).

I successfully gave my presentation, and was pretty happy with it. Everyone laughed during the video, and when I was leaving class a couple people came up to me and said that I did a good job and that the speech was interesting.

So it ended up good.
After all that, I definitly would have been pissed if it hadn't.

OH! My mom and I went to Bella Italia today! They have awesome italian food, and the restauraunt has a great atmosphere. It literally feels like you're in Italy! There was a lady playing an accordian, and the decor was so italian-esque. It was such a nice change from places like Olive Garden.

Tomorrow, my Papa and I are going to a peace rally in downtown Modesto. It should be fun. It is going to be in that square that Brendan Theatre's is in, and then if we want to walk for peace I guess we start from Brendan and walk around downtown or something. I'm looking forward to it! I went last year for the anniversary of the war in Iraq, but it was in Walnut Creek. It will be nice to not have to drive an hour away :) (although I was looking forward to getting out of Modesto).

I'm out.

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I should really be...

nobody@vox.com(So Jessy) — Wed, 14 Mar 2007 22:31:52 -0700

I should really be doing my chemistry homework.

But I don't feel like it. At all.

After getting barely three hours of sleep last night, I can't seem to concentrate because the incessant thought of, "sleep, comfy bed, dreams, la la land" won't leave me alone.

I cannot believe I let myself get so behind on school. I mean I am actually paying to go to school, and I'm doing really bad. It's all because I don't get enough sleep at night, so I only have so much energy to use during the day. I go to school at eight, work at one, and finally get home at five- thirtyish. By the time I get home, I'm literally brain dead. All I want to do is sleep. I usually do all of the easy homework that doesn't take much concentration, and then relax till I go to bed. I always figure, I'll do the major studying tomorrow, or, I can put it off until the weekend when I'll be more alert. But then, I can't sleep at night. I just lay there like a fucking zombie. Pisses me off. So then the whole cycle repeats the next day. By the time the weekend comes, I'm so tired, that I sleep the weekend away.

Now, I'm so far behind, that I don't think that I will ever truely catch up.

I'm working (not so) diligently on my chemistry homework. I've completed 13 out of 28 problems, and I figured that I need to get 26 right to get an A. So 13 more to go... yay (or not).

I lurrve my italian class though. It's flippin awesome. Mi piace il courso di italiano ma no non mi piace la chimica. (I like my italian course, but I don't like chemistry.)

Quali e il tuo numero di telefono? (What is your telephone number?)

Mio numero di telefono e nove, nove, sei, otto, sette, sei, sette. (My telephone number is - you translate lol-)

Quanti anni hai? (How old are you?)

Ho dicotto anni. (I am 18 years old.) <-- I'm not sure if I spelled dicotto right, and I'm too lazy to look. But, basically it means 18.

Dove abitano i genitori? (Where do your parents live?)

Il mia madre abita e Modesto ma il mio padre abita e Salida. (My mom lives in Modesto but my dad lives in Salida.)

Okay, enough of that! :) Today was really embarrassing though. La professoressa called on me, and pointed to the board and asked (in italian) if this is the time right now, what time will it be in two hours? The time on the board was one thirty, and I somehow didn't get the part about two hours from now, so I hesitantly answered: one thirty??? I knew I was wrong, but I had to answer something. Come to find out, the answer was supposed to be: "Fra due ore sono le tre e mezzo." Gah.

Anyway, seriously, no more talking about italian! lol. I guess my life is pretty uneventful. I've been so bored lately, so starving for human interaction that doesn't consist of school or work. Because I'm a lame ass hermit by nature, I don't have many real "friends" to go HEY, lets go hang out at your house. It's kind of depressing, because all of high school I always thought I would make real friends, good friends in college. And I haven't. I've met a lot of new and interesting people, but they are all just acquantances (sp??? =/). Just people you say hi to when you see them in the library, or run into in the science building. I guess my "make friends" skill is extremely rusty. Which is weird, because my mom says I'm really charismatic, and that all the students at the driving school think I'm "cool". It doesn't make sense to me. I just need to try harder I guess.

I've been feeling so constrained because of the wanting to be social, but no one to hang out with thing. I want to be free, I want to PARTY and have fun. LIVE LIFE. I just don't know how. Someone hand me "Social Life for Dummies" please.

I hope I'm not as boring as I think I am.

On another note, tell me why I am a fucking science major? I just started thinking about chemistry again, and how it is now due in an hour and a half. I hate, hate, hate (x 100000000000000) chemistry. Someone shoot me, cause I have about five more chem classes to take. I want to be an english major, but the money is in science. AND I WANT THE MONEY MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I can still write and publish stuff as a scientist. Boring stuff, but you know, stuff nonetheless.

Okay, I'm really off now to do my lame ass chemistry fucking homework :D.

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Cankersores Galore!

nobody@vox.com(So Jessy) — Sun, 18 Feb 2007 21:02:36 -0800

So for about the last week and a half, I have had killer cankersores. I am not even kidding you. I have at least six individual little sores in my mouth right now. The worst one is between my lower lip and my bottom teeth. It's like, directly in the middle, right where that little flap thing is. You know what I'm talking about? It's huge! I can feel it when I talk, when I'm chewing, and when food gets in that area (which is almost everytime I stick food in my mouth). It hurts soo bad. Then plus all the other sores I have, it really makes me wonder if my mouth is falling apart... lol. My mom says it has to do with the mono, either directly from it, or because of all the steroids and tylenol they had me on. I'm betting on the steroids.

This weekend has been fun! Friday, Mom and I went shopping for comforters for our new beds. We went to several places, but found nothing. Colleen, who is my boss, and her daughter met us at the Elephant bar for dinner. Of course, I didn't really enjoy the food because of the fricken cankersores, but it was fun nonetheless. After, we went to Gottschalks, where my mom found a comforter. At this point, I was exhausted! I had already gone to school that day, and then I probably really over did it with all the shopping. So we went home, and I went right to bed (it was barely 9pm).

Saturday consisted of cleaning up our rooms for the new beds. Because I did go to bed so early the night before, I was up at eight o' clock. We were done cleaning by 11ish, and the beds weren't supposed to get to the house until between one and five. We all took our showers and got ready because, who wants to be getting out of the shower when the bed people get to their house? Uh, not meee. Especially considering I always take showers in my moms bathroom now, and her bedroom and bathroom are connected (and not by a door!). You can literally see her shower from about fifty percent of her bedroom. The bed people ended up getting to our house at about two.

After we got the beds, we were free to leave the house and find me a comforter. We went to Kohls (which is where we should have gone in the first place, I can always find something I like there!) and I found the best comforter for my room. It fits perfectly with my bluish-green walls with the gold foe (sp?) finish on it. The comforter is almost the same bluish-green color as my walls, with brown designs all over it. Okay, it doesn't sound very pretty, but it is!

On Saturday I also bought Fall Out Boy tickets. It is for May 4th at Concord, two days after my 19th birthday! I posted it on ebay, but if it doesn't sell then I am going to find someone to go with me. I would just ask Nisha, but I'm nervous about our relationship. If things stabilize with us, then I'll go with him for sure.

Man, I hope it doesn't sell on ebay! Just talking about it on here makes me really want to go.

Today was boring... After a week filled with non-stop go-go-go, having nothing to do was like sin.

I didn't get my Italian book in the mail yet, which really sucks the big one, because I have an assignment due tomorrow that I obviously cannot do. I really just want to drop out of school. I'm so sick of tests and homework and speeches and attendance and all that crap.

I think most of this complaining is due to my period, just a FYI.

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Recap

nobody@vox.com(So Jessy) — Thu, 15 Feb 2007 20:54:04 -0800

I haven't posted a serious blog in exactly two months. But let me tell you, if I had, you would be seriously bored.

So my last post was December 15, 2006. Daniel had a birthday (he turned 14) on the 17th of December, and Christmas was the 25th (well, duh). My mom, Daniel, Nisha and I went to my papa's house to celebrate Christmas with my aunts, cousins and some of Kay's (Kay is my papa's girlfriend) family.

For the New Year, we went to my moms friend Sherry's, brother's house. It was so boring and my mom got SO drunk. Around eleven o' clock I managed to talk my mom into leaving, and we went to my papa's house.

On January 5th, I started feeling sick. I week later I went to the doctor, and found out through a blood test that I had mono! I had it really, really bad. My throat was so swollen that I couldn't eat, and my head (yes, MY HEAD) was so swollen that it was squeezing my eardrums (or something) so I that it felt like I had a never ending earache. My ears hurt so bad that I had a really hard time sleeping. If you've ever had mono, you know that all you DO is sleep, so it was horrible. I would sleep for fifteen minutes and wake up because of my ears, and then I would turn my head and my neck would hurt. It would feel like I had just gotten major whiplash or something. The mono also affected my liver, so technically, I'm still in full blown mono right now. I feel pretty good on the outside, but if I press against my liver, it hurts slightly. And the horror of my liver being affected is that I can't eat greasy or SPICY foods!!!! I just about died when I heard that, because I adore spicy food. Of course, at that time I couldn't even eat anything so it didn't really matter, but still.

Because of the mono, I had to drop my winter class. So now I have a big, fat W on my transcripts. Since my bloodwork still isn't coming back normal, I have to take it easy. Unfortunately, I just started the spring semester, and let me tell you, my schedule is INSANELY CRAZY. I have four classes MWF and I made them so they are all seven minutes apart. I also made my schedule where I have to literally run from class to class, because they are all on opposite sides of the campus. And Stan State is pretty big.

Yesterday was my first day of classes, and I feel like crap today. If I don't take it easy, I could relapse and get much worse than I was. At least if I don't relapse, I'll be losing a lot of weight from all the running! Haha.

So pretty much since January 5th, I've been doing absolutely nothing. I went back to work last week, which was hectic. While I was gone, the schedules got screwed up and the paperwork was barely touched. I spent the whole first week fixing everything and catching up the paperwork.

So school! It's interesting. I'm taking LOGIC, CHEMISTRY, PUBLIC SPEAKING (ew), and ITALIAN. I am so, so, so excited about learning Italian. Yesterday, the professor walked right in the room and started rambling in Italian. At the end of the class, she talked in english, and told us that she will never again speak english because we won't learn italian that way. Which makes sense. It's a really awesome class, I can tell it's going to be lots of fun by the way she teaches it. She pretty much parades around the room talking nonsense, but I actually did learn a lot (for a first day) and left the class with a huge smile on my face. Come ti cheeami? Mi cheeamo Jessica. LOL. I don't know if i spelled that right.

Chemistry actually looks easy. The syllabus describes every chapter, and it seems like at least half of it I have already learned in the Chemistry class I took freshman year, and a quarter of it I learned in Enviromental Science last year. The class will probably go into more depth then what I have already learned, but it seems I have a good basis for succeeding.

Okay, no one is going to read all of this rambling about school, so I'm going to shut up now about that.

In other news: my mom bought me and her new queen sized beds with her taxes. I have had the same, twin sized bed since I was two, and it's kinda nasty now. My dad said he bought it for fifty dollars, so I guess it's not even a nice, old bed. I've slept on it for sixteen years, so I wouldn't know if it's a cheapy bed. It's all I've ever known!

NISHA: Things with him and I aren't going so well right now. A couple of weeks after I got sick I found out about a huge, CONTINUOUS lie that he told, so things have been pretty rocky. He really needs to move out, as I need my space to get over it, and so I can learn to trust him again (if I can).

DANIEL: Brothers, geez. So annoying, but you gotta love them. He is doing a lot better in school now, which is good. Danny did get suspended for cussing out a substitute teacher a few weeks ago (hah, he is our mothers child), but at least he isn't in danger of working at Burger King for the rest of his life anymore. Gosh Burger King, how I totally do not miss thee. I can't believe it's been almost a year since I QUIT. Gah.

CHRIS: is doing well. He got a good job in Sunnyvale or something (?) that pays around seventeen dollars an hour (I think? lol).

I guess I've rambled all I can right now... I can't think of anything more to say. Let's pray I don't over-do myself and get mono again. No more W's!!! Hehe.

The OC is starting in a few minutes, so I have to hurry downstairs to watch it. I can't believe how entirely stupid the show has gotten. Since there are only two more episodes left, I feel obliged to watch it though.

Later!

<3Jessy

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