You can find me at: jessymessy.com

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All semester I had an A in my research methods class. It is a really, really hard class- lots of reading and studying, basically. Well, I completely and totally bombed the final. I got a D on it. Which brought my steady A to a B+. All of Monday I felt like I was going to be sick. A B+ in this class is a great grade, and if I hadn't had an A all semester I would be ecstatic to have it.

Oh well.

So far I have two A's and a B+.
Still waiting for two more grades to be posted. I despise waiting.

Yesterday I finished most of my study abroad application. I just need to wait for the rest of my grades to be posted so I can fill out the GPA part, and write the essay portion. I also need to order my transcript and apply for a passport.

Did you know it costs ONE HUNDRED dollars to get a passport? It's really not a big deal, I have a study abroad savings to pull this money from, but STILL. I need to put my passport information on the study abroad application, so I guess I have to go get it. It will totally suck if I have a one hundred dollar passport and don't get accepted to study abroad. Just sayin'.

According to the website, currently it will take about three weeks to get the passport in the mail. And the application is due on February 1st. So pretty much I need to do this before the end of the first week of January. I'll do it sooner, just to make sure I get it in time.

Other than grades and study abroad, I am already bored to death. I'm so used to constantly having things to do. This nothingness is strange. But you know I love it.

I'm rereading Twilight. And then I have a whole stack of books just waiting to be read. And all I really asked for Christmas was books, so I should have plenty to read between now and February 16th, when school starts again.

Daniel B-day

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Kenny

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I had a great time in Oregon. Amazingly, I have never been that far north before. I can't believe all my life such a beautiful city such as Portland could have only been an hour and a half plane ride away. I could honestly see myself living there.

It is a very lawful place. Everywhere you go, there are signs saying that it is unlawful to do blah blah blah. And the speed limit on the freeways never exceed 55, and surprisingly, no one ever goes over the speed limit. To a Californian, 55 on the freeway feels extremely slow, almost like we were crawling. Everyone seemed to drive safe, no one was in a hurry. It was crazy. Today I had to run some errands and felt like my life was in jeopardy on several incidents. It made me miss Oregon.

While we were there it snowed! I haven't seen snow since I was about fifteen, which is way too long to go without seeing snow. I love the snow.

On Sunday morning mom woke me up at 7am because she wanted to go to Starbucks. While she had her morning cigarette before we left, ashes seemed to be falling from the sky. It took me a moment to realize they were wispy, tiny snow flakes. It was so beautiful. It did that all day long until we started to drive back to Portland. Normally, Portland is about an hours drive away from Sheridan. But it took us about two and a half hours to get there, because it started to snow heavily. To the point where we had to drive about twenty to thirty miles an hour.

We stopped at a gas station along the way. Did you know that it is required by law in Oregon for a gas station attendant to fill your tank for you? So while that was going on, I filled my bare hands with icy cold snow, and posed for a picture. My aunt is supposed to email it to me, I'll post it when she does.

Apart from the snow, I also had a great time visiting my Grandpa. I haven't mentioned why he moved to Sheridan on here yet, mostly because I used to find the reason embarrassing. But after visiting him, my embarrassment faded away. He is serving two years at a federal prison in Sheridan for tax evasion. The prison is amazing. He is in a minimum security prison, so there are no fences, he doesn't have a prison cell- nothing like that.

He lives in something that is very similar to a dorm. No, he doesn't have his own room or anything, but he has a bunk mate, his own desk and locker, and each "wing" has a bathroom and showers.

It really is a great place to be, if you have to go to prison. It's almost like going away to college, as he puts it. He is with a bunch of people who committed similar white collar crimes, and it's not as bad as my mind had envisioned at all.

I miss him a lot though.

It was great to see him. To see that he is okay. He was in such great spirits, and he reminded me that you create your own reality. So many people that he lives with have a negative outlook on prison... and honestly, it makes sense. But he is all about mind over matter, and making the best of everything. Prisoners are encouraged to take classes that are taught by other prisoners. He is taking a class called deep thinking which stresses positive thinking. When the guy who teaches it gets out in March my grandpa will take over teaching it.

The time went by so quickly. We had three hours with him Friday night, four Saturday and four Sunday.

I honestly think it is ridiculous to stick someone who committed the crime of tax evasion in jail. He is already in debt to the tax payers by evasion, and now he is just eating up more tax dollars by sitting in prison. Don't you think it would be more effective to put him on house arrest for two years instead, and have him get a job where he can pay back his debt?

It's just all so frustrating.

Anyway, we're back now. I probably won't get to see him again until the summer, if even then.

Here is a picture we snagged of him. After visiting hours were over he said he was going to walk the track (he walks at least a mile a day), so we said we would drive by and get a picture of him.

Papa

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It seems that since the immediate stress of school is off of my shoulders I'm finding more inspiration to write.
I just have one more final on Monday, and I'm done. Wooo!

All the hype about the new "Twilight" movie got me wondering... how could there be such an awesome book on the shelves to create this kind of frenzy --and I've never read it?

So while studying at Borders a few weeks ago, I caved in and bought the first "Twilight" book. And then four days later I had read the whole saga.

I'm hooked.

Last week I saw the movie, and my initial reaction was that it was good, but the book was definitely better (the book is ALWAYS better!). I didn't like some of the things that they changed, and I felt they didn't develop Bella and Edwards relationship very clearly-- all of a sudden they were in love.

But then I watched it again last night. I actually found it on movie6.net-- I figured I already paid to go watch it so it wouldn't be a sin to steal it this way.

This time it had been a while since I had read the first book (like a whole entire two weeks), and I liked it a lot more. I don't know why I thought they didn't develop the relationship effectively. The second time around I totally got it.

I'm really fighting the urge to go watch it AGAIN.
Me = PATHETIC.

I'm still more obsessed with Harry Potter though. And my excuse there is that I grew up with those books.

Anyway, I'm developing a very teenager-y crush on the guy who plays Edward. It's even more pathetic than my new-found obsession with Twilight.

I even have his picture on my desktop.

And I spent two hours last night watching interviews of him on youtube.
I told you it was pathetic. I feel like I'm thirteen again.

But who couldn't love his sense of humor? It's ironically similar to mine, only he's better at the sarcasm-ness. Half the time people don't even know I'm joking.

And also he has a shy, goofy awkwardness about him, but yet he seems very sure of himself and confident at the same time. *sigh* 

Where did my sanity go?! I'm sitting on here gushing about a celebrity boy.

Oy.

I need to go pack for Oregon. I'll be sure to pack my copy of Twilight in my carry-on bag. I'm dying to read it again. I'm also packing my Obama book, "The Audacity of Hope" and a Michael Crichton book- an old one "The Great Train Robbery." I need to have choices. Who knows what I will want to read once I get on the plane?

I have to be up at 7am (ew), and we are leaving at 8am.

Bringing the laptop, but I don't know if I'll have internet access.

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Every year pugs.com holds 'Pugmas' and everyone who signs up gets a secret Santa. Well, today Hamlet got his secret Santa gift in the mail. Here are some pictures of him:

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Hamlet with all of his gifts ^

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They made Hamlet a shirt with his name on it! ^

Today I got out my small suitcase out so I can start packing. Amazingly, I do not own any clothes for extreme winter weather. I have no big jacket, or even a jacket with a hood... unless you're including hoodies, which I'm not.

I don't know if it's worth it to run out and buy a big warm jacket. I figure I will run from one building to another. Or a building to a car and a car to a building. I won't be outside much, right? Hmmm.

Tomorrow is my dad's birthday. I can't say what I got him YET, but I'm excited to give it to him. Right now I have a flourless cake in the oven... it better come out good! I thought it would be an easy recipe to make, it only had five ingredients--> water, salt, butter, chocolate, eggs. But it was not easy! LOL. Melt chocolate (which I had to do three times because I couldn't fit all the chocolate in one bowl), beat in chocolate slowly, beat in one egg at a time (and there was six!), cut butter into small pieces and add one at time... ugh, my feet hurt from standing for so long.

Anyway, took my anthropology final today. I didn't put a lot of time into studying, so I don't think I did terribly well on it. I put question marks next to all the questions I was unsure of and it adds up to about an 85%. I'm pretty sure I needed an A on the final to get an A in the class. Oh well. I'm over it already. The class was horrible and I'm more than happy walking out of there with a B!

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I have my anthropology final tomorrow. So very excited. I'm hell of pissed because in order to study abroad I need to take a class called Communication Theory. Next semester they only offer ONE of these courses with only twenty spots available. This morning was my registration appointment, and not only was the class FULL, but it was closed. Meaning they were taking no more wait-listers.

Fortunately, this class is being held in two locations. The Turlock campus (the campus I always go to) and the Stockton campus. The way it works is the professor is at the Turlock campus, and it is being streamed live to the Stockton campus. Stockton can make comments, ask questions, whatever- just like they are in the Turlock campus. Very cool. The Stockton campus had a wait, but it was not closed yet. So, I signed up for the Stockton campus.

I am currently in the #1 position, so when someone drops (which they BETTER!), I get in. Unfortunately, this means I get to rush to Stockton once a week for this class. It is from 6-9 on Wednesdays. My class before that ends at 4pm, so I will pretty much have to rush to my car, and zoom to Stockton. Ugh ugh ugh. But I'll do it, because at this point I'm not going to not study abroad just because the CSU system SUCKS and is offering less and less classes as each semester goes by (thank you California for having no money to put toward education. Obviously we can see where our priorities are).

On Friday I'm flying to Oregon to see my grandpa. I was excited, until I learned - from weather.com - that they are probably going to be having the worst of the winter weather while I am there. Greaaaat. Hello snow, rain, lots of wind, and COLD. I love the cold, and I love snow-- I even like the wind, and the sound of it, while I get to sit next to the fire and read a good book. But I don't like the idea of traveling in an airplane through it. And traveling, by rental car, for an hour and a half through it. I've never driven in the snow before. Will the rental car company give me chains, or will I have to go out and buy some?

I swear I am in a good mood. Really. I'm just in sarcastic complain-y mode right now. And mostly I'm studying, so it's not making things any better =).

Something really funny happened today, but I fear of writing about it in case my dad were to happen by my blog. Because obviously, this story includes him. And his upcoming birthday, which is in two days. And the present that I've frequented Circuit City way too many times to get him.

I'll write about it on Thursday after the gift giving. I would hate to ruin the surprise at this point.

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For some reason beyond me, I volunteered to help out during Petsmart's Santa picture day/thing. I am volunteering through a group called Alley Cat Guardians. Last summer I volunteered for one of there feral cat spay/neuter program. Basically people trap feral cats and bring them to the monthly clinic to be fixed, that way these cats won't breed more feral cats. It's a really good program, but like I said I only volunteered once-- primarily because the sight of blood made me feel like throwing up. I had no idea that blood could do this to me, but I really think my reaction came also from the fact that the cat looked like it was dead. My job during the clinic was to clean up the cats after surgery (like the blood), clean their ears, give them heartworm/flea/tick prevention, and put them back in the cages before they woke up.

Never again.

But, since Alley Cat Guardian's is a good cause, I feel I should help them out in other ways whenever possible.
For instance in their Santa picture day. Photo's cost ten dollars, and five of that goes to ACG.
I get to be the photographer, which sounds like an awesome job... but then not. Because I suck at taking pictures. Sure, I can take a good picture, but it usually takes me two, three, or even four tries to get it right.

Oh well though. These people are paying ten bucks for a picture, they should expect it to not be the greatest.
I'm still worried though.

I'm also worried because I have an essay due in lit. on Monday, and I've barely even though about it. I won't get home from the Santa thing until about 5pm tomorrow.

Why do I do this to myself?

In happy news, Monday is my last official day of school. I have a final Wednesday night, and the following Monday, and then I am done. YES. I think I will get three A's and two B's. Still good enough to make the dean's list, but I really want an A in lit. Probably not going to happen because I need to get an A on the paper due Monday to get an A in the class, and at this point I think that is doubtful.

But you never know. Inspiration could hit and I might write the most awesome paper ever. Not likely. I hate writing lit essays. I took the class because I love to read, and why not take a GE class where I am forced to? But the essay part makes me cringe. I'm much better at COMM essays, or with writing where I can be creative. I think most of my problem is I don't know how to write a good lit essay. I never know what to say, and all I want to do is summarize what I read. I think I will try to approach it by finding a topic I like in the book, and then doing a lot of research online and making most of my essay like a... well, a research essay.

I was thinking of writing on Diana Abu-Jaber's novel "Crescent." A topic I can look into would be people from the middle east, and how they cope with being in America. UGH. I love love love this novel, but I dread dread dread writing an essay.

I could compare "Crescent" to "The Lone Ranger and the Tonto Fistfight in Heaven"-- which is a novel about the Spokane indians. I could find research about how they cope with being Americanized in the late 19th- to early 20th-century and relate it to the middle east; the characters could be related to. Hmmmmmmm. I could have something here.

Maybe not something original, but something. Something to put on paper. Something to have to turn in that is at least semi-good.

Ahhh, must sleep now. I have to be at Petsmart at 10am tomorrow, which means I have to be up at 8:30.
cries.

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After a year and a half, all of my bad grades from the semester when I had mono are going to be off my transcript!! You have no idea how great I feel right now. I was beginning to think that I would be carrying these grades with me while I was applying to grad school/law school. But no! It is currently processing, and I am absolutely dying to know what my GPA will be once they are off. My GPA right now is 2.98 (cringe), but once my F, WU and two NC's come off my transcript I think my GPA could be as high as a 3.5! The two NC's don't affect my GPA, but the WU is the equivalent of an F. And the F I have is in a five unit course, so it is holding a lot of weight on my GPA.

Plus, when I am done with this semester, I should have four A's and one B. Woot! What will that do to my GPA?

I absolutely cannot wait until this semester is over. Correction: I can't wait until after December 1st. On December 1st I get to take part in a persuasive interview (which will be held in front of the whole class, and VIDEO TAPED so I can write a final paper about it later) for my Professional Interviewing class. FUN. not.

Once that is over, the rest of finals will be a breeze. Well, maybe not a breeze. But at least this knot in my stomach will be gone. If it was a persuasive speech... I could handle that... but an interview?! Anything could happen. I despise living in ambiguity.

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There is too much going on right now. My head is spinning.
Essays, group projects, individual projects, presentations, etc.
It's hectic.

On an exciting note, I met with the study abroad coordinator last Friday. I didn't really learn anything I didn't already know, but it was good for her to know my face--- especially considering she is on the interview panel, which more or less decides whether or not you can study abroad.

I started the application this weekend, too. Just the easy stuff. Like my name, address. The essay can wait until the last minute, no big deal. =P

Going to ask Professor H on Wednesday to write me a recommendation. I have an advising meeting with her that day, so it will be a good chance to ask.

I have absolutely no idea when I will ask Professor P. I was considering not asking him and asking my Research Methods professor. I'm doing really well in her class, and I've been going to her a lot for help so she knows me fairly well. Hmmm. Maybe ask P and Dr. L and see which one writes me a better recommendation. Tehehehehe.

So tired.
Can't wait for this hell of a semester to be over. NO MORE GROUP PROJECTS PLEASEEEEEEEE!

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